Maintaining...

So having been thrust feet first into our busiest season of the year (I currently work on a loading dock for a company that has a big share of the parcels business) my entire life has become about work, sleep, snatching something to eat, repeat, repeat, repeat...

I can tell right now there will be no further gaining for me until at least January.  My goal at this point is simply to maintain my weight at over 210 pounds.  This will be a huge accomplishment seeing as I'm burning crazy amounts of calories at work...heavy manual labour combined with working in extremely cold conditions for long hours.  Last year I lost 10-15 pounds over the 10 weeks that included Christmas just because of this.  

If I can make it to January the same weight I am now...for me this will be a huge WIN.

Automatic Gainer Mode Engaged

Interestingly, even though I've decided to take a short break, I'm still getting bigger.  Last night I weighed in at 212 pounds.  It appears that my body has finally and firmly committed itself to the process of getting fat 'for realz'.  Not that I'm complaining - it's nice that I've finally gotten used to eating the larger amounts I need to keep on gaining.  I just never figured it would only take a matter of weeks to get this so ingrained into my daily routine.

I think it's time to raise the bar for myself and shoot for the 4500 - 5000 calorie a day mark and keep on until eating this much more comes naturally, too.  And after that perhaps flirt with 6000 calories a day and so on.  The idea behind this is to aggressively gain until I'm (finally!) big enough...which will be a LOT bigger than I am now...and then figure how much I'll need to eat daily in order to maintain my new larger size.

Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween everyone!  This is one of the most awesome times of year...well, actually, the few days after Halloween are the best because that's when stores are blowing out for cheap all the candy that didn't sell.  Bags and bags of tiny M&Ms sit nicely in the passenger seat of my car and those tiny calories do add up...!

So looking back at the last month or so, I'm super impressed by the fact that I was able to gain 10 pounds in 30 days.  It took work and planning but I've proven now that it IS possible.  Everything's SO much easier now that I'm 'out' about gaining.  And now that I've got the diet figured out...it's becoming routine to eat large amounts of high calorie food.

I've been taking a short gaining hiatus the last few days just to let my brain catch up to where my body's at.  I realize then 10 pounds isn't *that* much weight...but for me, at least, to have done this in a single month...it's taking more getting used to than I thought it would.

That being said, I'm planning to repeat this gaining feat for November.  By December 1, I fully expect to clock in at 220 + pounds.

So far I have no regrets.  I really love the changes that I'm seeing, the fact that my belly's just blowing up into such perfect roundness, and the all over feeling of just being more massive.

I'm really excited to know that I'm finally firmly on the path to realizing this lifelong dream.

Rolling right along...

As of today I'm a hefty 211 pounds!

For awhile there I was gaining a pound every three days.  I've slowed down a bit just because eating that much food, gaining that fast, it's really hard to do on a sustained basis.

I must be doing something right though...the weight is still creeping on quickly enough that I'm *very* happy with my progress so far.  After so many weeks of forcing myself to eat 4000 + calories per day it's become habitual to eat this way now.  Which is a good thing - it's taking more and more calories to maintain my size as I'm getting bigger. In order to *stay* big, I've got to *eat* big.

My belly is starting to stick wayyy out now and I find myself running into things with it, mostly at work where there's narrow passageways and lots of mazelike areas to navigate.  It's distracting as hell every time it happens and I have a feeling it's just going to get to be more of an ongoing concern as my stomach expands into the huge and heavy belly I'm working so hard to acquire.  I suppose eventually I'm going to get used to having that much body mass...but for right now it's strange having to relearn how to move through various spaces without crashing into things.  Which is funny because I haven't even gained that much weight. Yet.

On a roll now...

I am, with great happiness, able to say that the effort I've been putting in the last few weeks is paying off!

As of today I'm at 208 pounds.  Looking back it's clear that on average I've been gaining one pound every three days.  Though I've been careful not to binge, I've been documenting everything on the spreadsheet and ensuring that I exceed 4000 calories a day by as much as possible.  It was hard for the first week or so (I just felt super full and bloated all the time), but after nearly three weeks of this new "diet" I find now that it's getting a LOT easier to eat amounts of food in one sitting that in the past I just couldn't have handled. Drinking a lot of water with each meal is definitely helping...not only does the water help with digestion but I'm pretty sure that even in this short amount of time I've managed to greatly increase my stomach's capacity by topping up with as much water as possible in order to stretch it after every meal.

Taking daily walks helps keep things moving, as does scrupulously avoiding all possible gluten contamination and other digestive irritants such as large amounts of xanthan gum and carrageenan.

And yes, my body is continuing to fill out in wonderful ways: my shoulders and arms are thicker around than they've ever been, my 'moobs' would now fill a B cup, my love handles spread way out now when I lie down, and of course, my belly is firmer, rounder and larger than it's ever been.  

I feel a deep sense of satisfaction about the fact that I'm (finally!) starting to get really fat.  Choosing to eat like this, to work towards getting as fat as I can, has been the right thing for me...but at the same time, deep in the back of my mind, I know I've still got a LONG way to go before the wonder and excitement of "getting fatter" becomes the simple satisfaction of being "fat enough".

Belly's really starting to "show" now...

The motivation I've been feeling to gain is really paying off.  I've been averaging somewhere between 3700 and 4300 calories a day.  While I know this doesn't sound like a lot to gainers who are a lot bigger than I am right now, for me the extra 750 - 1000 calories a day are really adding up and making a difference.  I know full well that as continue to get bigger, I'm going to have to eat more than this just to maintain my size.  But for right now, I'm overjoyed with how things are coming along.

At 207 pounds I'm officially heavier than I've ever been in my life.  This makes me happy in so many ways.

I'm kind of astounded at how big my belly is already.  I actually find myself distracted by it, I guess because it's still so new to me.  Looking in the mirror, I can see how much bigger I am.  At the same time, I know I've got a LOT further to go.  Seeing the growth and actually feeling it as a permanent part of me are wild.  In the past I've padded to make myself look this big but at the end of the day have always had to take it off and 'shrink' back down to reality.  While I have no regrets whatsoever so far about the fact that I'm continuing to get fatter, it IS weird to be walking around, working, shopping, etc. with this bigger belly all the time.  I admit I'm a little self conscious but at the same time it feels so right that I'm getting bigger.  I really look forward to the time (at this rate, sooner rather than later) when I've finished with the gaining part and just consider it normal that I have the large round body I've always dreamed about.

On a related note: the documentary was released on Monday.

Here's the link to it: http://www.vocativ.com/video/culture/society/gainers/.  

My only regret is that the piece couldn't have been longer - there were hours and hours of footage that never got used.  That being said, overall I believe they got the message right and didn't turn it into a freak show puff piece.  My thanks to interviewer Edward Christiansen and Michael the Video Guy for taking the time to fly out here from New York City to do the filming, as well for trusting me not to stand you up once you got here.

As far as I know, they *still* don't know my last name or where I live.  That's faith, people.

Building infrastructure...

So today I met with an encourager I connected with on Grommr.  Seems I've been taking a lot of strange risks lately...and yet, so far, they've all paid off.  Anyway, in the interest of not outing anyone, let's call him "Bob".  So Bob and I had a nice lunch in which I discovered I actually *can't* eat two personal sized pizzas in a single sitting as much as I try to throw good intentions at them.  I'm good for exactly one and a half at this point. One of the goals that came out of this meeting is to eventually be able to eat two of those things as part of a single meal.  One suggestion Bob had was to condition my stomach to increase its capacity by drinking a large amount of water all at once a couple of hours before mealtime.  This is definitely something I'm going to try...but not right before work or bedtime because all that water's eventually got to go somewhere.

I found it profoundly interesting to converse with someone who wants me to get fat as much as *I* do.  What's interesting is that Bob himself is a big guy, not a gainer, and actually trying to lose weight.  It was awkward at times because I didn't want to offend him by being so incredibly pro-gaining to a guy who's pro-losing.  I admit I'm still trying to wrap my brain around this.  But...Bob's on board to helping me get fat and I'm sure not going to question it.  Keeping myself on a forced diet of excess calories day in and day out can at times be a total drag that I suspect is on par with the dilemma of someone who must count every calorie to lose weight.  Frankly, the more help I can get, the better.

It's just too bad there wasn't way to magically transfer all of Bob's excess weight onto my own (still relatively slender) frame because I think it would be indescribably awesome to wake up tomorrow and find I was suddenly, massively 300 + pounds.  Oh well, this is the stuff of gainer fiction.  In reality, like all worthwhile things, this one's going to take patience and effort. There is also something to be said for enjoying the trip.

Another interesting thing...lately I've been 'outing' myself about gaining to various people in my life.  I want to prepare them for the new and improved me to avoid awkward conversations down the road that may otherwise happen at inconvenient times.  And I want to avoid the whole "Wow, you're getting fat, time for a diet/go get your thyroid checked" routine.

Also, I have the idea that the if people around me have a clear understanding that I'm getting fat on purpose, that they will expect to see me gain a lot of weight and in a way this actually provides added pressure/responsibility (at least in my mind) for me to actually DO this.  And I guess part of it, too, is gauging reactions to this bit of information about myself.  I'm not entirely sure what I expected but so far the overall impression is mild confusion mixed with "it's your body, do what you want as long as you're not hurting anyone and you stay relatively healthy".  Nobody's really cheering me on but at the same time nobody's freaking out about it either.  Which is a-okay with me.  Of course, once I actually start fulfilling my intentions in a big way (no pun intended), this conversation may change...and I'm going to have to cross that bridge when I come to it.

Until then, I'm doing my best to adhere to a 4000 calorie a day diet.  The last ten days or so, since I've made my resolution to truly move forward and keep gaining no matter what, I've been eating as much as I can but it's pretty random. Though I'm definitely feeling the weight creeping on, it's just not happening as quickly and consistently as I'd like.

In light of this, Bob and I agreed that I'd provide him with a daily copy of my spreadsheet to keep better track of how successfully I'm keeping to the plan.  I sincerely do hope that after struggling through this long enough and consistently being able to get those 4000 calories a day into me, that eventually eating this amount of food will become second nature to me...which it will have to be if I want to stay as big, round, and happy as I'm working so hard getting to be.

On that note, I'm off for a big bowl of buttered rice.

It's all green lights from here...

Well, the past week I've been highly motivated to eat.  Partly because I'm finally starting to network within our local gainer/encourager community (amazing how much one can do when one doesn't feel the need to hide the shadows, eh?) and partly because I'm just so damned tired of being this skinny.  I suspect the weather has a bit to do with it too: we're sliding back into winter now.  Today is grey and cold with grudging tiny flakes of snow.  I'm okay with that.  I suffer in the summer heat and I'm glad the cooler season is on us now.

It's kind of funny...yesterday I was at a social occasion with someone I see maybe once a month.  She remarked that it looked like I was losing weight and that I was looking good (seems she always makes a comment like this just as I'm starting to get fatter again..so...maybe a catty insult in disguise?  Who knows?)  Anyway, I just patted my belly proudly and proclaimed that in fact I'm heavier than ever and that being fat must really agree with me.

Although I've only move a single digit on the scale, I can already see and feel the extra effort paying off.  I've had the "gainer itch" across my belly for a few days now and I can feel everything firming up.  And I truly believe this: I really *like* the way my appearance is changing as I gain weight.   I love the fact that my belly is getting bigger and the feeling of thick heaviness that a big belly brings.

I'm overjoyed about the fact that I can get as fat as I want to now...without the guilt...and without having to hide what I'm doing anymore.

More about me...

I do believe I've successfully mastered the art of "pages".

You will notice there are two static links at the top of this blog just below the title.  One is a short piece about what's going through my head about gaining for anyone who is here to actually read the blog and not just admire my amateur photographic talent.

The other, labelled PROGRESS PICTURES is a link to a page with some pictures that I believe best illustrate how my appearance is changing (improving!) as I continue getting fatter.  I will, of course, update this page at regular intervals so that I can best document this experience. With any luck, the process from here will be swift, dramatic, and massive because I can honestly say at this point that I don't EVER again want to be as "thin" as I am right now.

27 September 2014

I've had to redo the poll.  For some reason Blogspot, although it will allow you to do a two year poll, doesn't seem to cope well once the poll gets into the second year.  Votes are slowly eroding and the poll is getting weird.

So I've redone the poll with what I think are better questions with a little more information for each choice based on how I estimate each stage of gaining will impact my physical appearance.

I realize that having a poll about myself is narcissistic but to be fair, this IS my blog and it's solely about me and how I'm actively endeavoring to make myself as fat as I can. You all wouldn't be here if you weren't at least a little interested in my journey.

Even though you most likely voted on the last poll, feel free to plug your opinions into the new one.  I'm always curious to know just what people who are reading this are thinking about what I'm doing.

And, as always, I welcome comments. I have moderation ON for the comments because there's been a fair amount of spam coming my way. If you post a comment, it will NOT immediately appear.  As soon as I log in, I will see it and, so long as you're not trying to sell sunglasses to the masses, I'll approve it and it WILL show up here.  I'm always curious to hear from people.  Encouragement is awesome but so is debate. If you have any questions about what I'm doing or more importantly *why*, get in touch with me either in the comments section or by e-mail at roundboy123456@yahoo.ca.  It may be a few days or weeks but I do always, eventually, get back to everyone who takes the time to contact me.

Cheers everyone!  I'm off to eat "Second Breakfast"...

26 September 2014

I've ramped up my food intake to my reasonable limits and, barring any unforeseen circumstance, plan to keep working at extending those limits as far as I can.  Ideally, if I could eventually get myself to eating double the amount that I eat now on a daily basis, I could really start to pack on the pounds.  Even after I've managed to get where I need to in terms of weight...and I've decided that this is going to be a LOT more weight...as in finding the exact limit of just how big I can get and still manage to function...I know if  I'm to maintain it, I'm going to have to eat like a champion for as long as I want to maintain my new body size.

It's odd just how hungry I am in spite of the fact that I just had a large bowl of rice topped with a hefty chunk of butter.  I really do think a lot of this is in the mind. It's like suddenly everything's okay, the last of the emotional hurdles have been cleared, and now it's just a technical matter of getting fat as quickly and efficiently as possible.

And I'd be lying if I said I wasn't looking forward to experiencing all the profound changes that are about to start happening for real...after so many years of only dreaming about doing this.

24 September 2014

Well, sometimes there IS such a thing as free lunch.  Or at least a whole lot of yummy food that gets sent in one's direction after it's done being used as film props.

Without going into too much detail about this so as not to interfere with the production of the piece, I *can* tell you that I was contacted a few weeks ago, out of the blue, by a journalist about doing a documentary on what it's like to be a gainer.  It was so strange and improbable that I admit I had a great deal of concern about doing this.  Having seen how gainers are treated by mainstream media by the likes of Dr. Oz, Maury, etc...at first I just wasn't willing to go there.

I was curious though, just to see how this would play out.  So I corresponded with the journalist a few times on e-mail and this, in addition to a single 20 minute phone call, was enough for him to fly up from the States with a cameraman.  Didn't know my name or my address.   Still doesn't as far as I know.  It was a HUGE leap of faith on their part because it would have been super easy for me to get cold feet and simply evaporate on them with no fear of reprisal.  I'd be lying if I said I hadn't considered it.  But there was enough transparency on their part, and a lack of red flags, to convince me that this would be worth doing.

The first day of filming was nerve wracking for me...I had terrible visions of getting there and finding an orgy in progress.  Or a room full of "tourists" looking to ogle the weirdo.  Of getting "roofied" and never being heard from again.  Lots of variables and lots of room for things for me to be paranoid about.

In the end, though, it worked out better than I ever could have imagined. The journalist was professional, sensitive, careful not to offend, and I could tell by the line of questioning that this is not going to turn into one of those drive by freak show puff pieces that dominate mainstream media.

He told me part of what drew him to approaching me was, in fact, this very blog as well as how I handled myself on the Reddit AMA from November 2011.  He said he was impressed by the thoughtfulness of my posts and how I was dealing with so many of the issues surrounding being a gainer.

So...after two very hard days of shooting (I have acquired serious respect for professional actors who deal with the constant staging of camera shots and all the technical stuff that comes with lighting etc.  Spending six hours in a small room with a giant light right in your face, brighter than the midday sun and just about as hot is truly an endurance test I don't care to repeat anytime soon), they've got hours of footage.  It will be very interesting to see what makes it through editing and to see the vision of the final piece.

I'm simply exhausted now though.  This whole experience has pushed me so far beyond my comfort zone that if I look back now, I'm sure it's so far gone as to have slipped below the horizon.  I've gone from making quiet blog posts to myself in the wee hours to discussing my entire experience with a stranger for a documentary whose distribution I have absolutely no control over.  I've had to come "out" as a gainer to two more friends as a result of this (non issue with both of them) and also managed to plunge my husband square into the middle of this.  He knows a LOT more about my gaining ways now than he ever suspected he would.

It was really difficult the first day because I hadn't even told my husband that I was doing this documentary.  I just said I was going to a meeting.  That night when I got home I guess he could tell something was up and when he asked, I told him all about it. As I was saying the words to explain this all to him, even to me it sounded so freaking improbable that I knew he was going to need to meet the crew.  So he came along for the last day of shooting and will end up being in the documentary as well.  I know it was hard for him.  But I also know it was exactly the right thing to do because if I hadn't, he would have always wondered about this.  Now at least he knows for sure what it was about because he's shared part of the experience of it.

In all, this was terrifying, exhausting, but also in so many ways extremely positive and validating of my own experience.  Although I still consider myself to be odder than the average person, it turns out that I'm not nearly the freak I always thought I was.  Although I am going against social norms, this really *isn't* as big a deal as I'd always thought.  

Again (and I know I've said this *far* too many times before), I really DO think the Year of the Big Gain has begun.  Roadblocks have fallen (including more than in a few that existed solely in my own mind) and I'm starting to get more support through networking with other gainers and encouragers (including a number of very cool local people).  It's all starting to come together.  And this makes me SO happy!

Time to go dig in to that awesome pile of food...

18 September 2014

What a busy and complicated summer it's been!  I've been everywhere from Ottawa to Victoria and a number of really strange places in between and as a result haven't had time to update this blog.

So update: I've backslid a tiny bit.  Currently weighing in at 203 pounds.  Again, though I'm sure I say this too much already, although I haven't managed to get bigger lately, I also haven't allowed myself to backslide too much either.  I really do consider it a WIN that I've been able, approximately, to maintain my current bulk considering how hard it can be to eat gluten free when travelling.

I had a bad scene happen early August when I paid to eat at a communal kitchen at a festival I was at.  Five days of getting progressively sicker because the people cooking, who solemnly swore up front they knew how to keep me safe from gluten, either didn't know as much as they thought they did about the issue, or else had no idea just how sensitive I am to gluten and cross contamination.  It took me weeks...literally weeks...to recover from that.  Imagine getting a second degree burn down the length of your intestines and you'll get a vague idea of what I'm talking about.  It. Was. Bad.

Anyway, I'm recovered now and digesting normally (yay!)...

It seems lately that a lot of things are aligning in surprising and pleasing ways: I'm experiencing employment stability as a result of being hired on as a permanent employee (with the income and benefits to match), that my other half is aware and okay with the fact that I'm doing everything in my power to be fat, that my circle of friends, though not specifically aware that I'm gaining on purpose, aren't being too judgy about the fact that I'm noticeably bigger every time they see me, and that I'm starting to connect with other folks in the gainer community in ways that I sincerely hope will end up being mutually supportive.

I know I've probably said this before, but I really DO think this will be The Year of the Big Gain.

Allrighty...

August is looking like a complicated month to try and organize *anything*.  So I've bumped this dinner into September.  I'm arbitrarily picking Wednesday September 17th.  I've decided to go slightly higher class and go with Haweli near the Boardwalk Market in downtown Edmonton.  It's got a buffet that actually lists the allergens in each item (a big deal for me, esp. since I was sorely reminded about a week ago as to why it's important for me to avoid ALL gluten), the food is excellent, and the restaurant itself has fairly nice ambiance.  The only downside is that dinner with a drink will run about $30 each (which is only nine dollars more than I paid for two pieces of battered fish at Brit's, so...)

Anyway, if you're thinking of coming joining me/us, please drop me a line at roundboy123456@yahoo.ca so I can know how many to make the reservation for.

This is a "meet and greet" type thing and purely social and...I would hope...non threatening.

Anyway, hopefully I don't end up eating alone...

15 July 2014

So I'm thinking of trying to do another dinner get together possibly around August 20th here in Edmonton.  I'm thinking Indian buffet (I've got a place in mind that isn't too expensive).  Drop me an e-mail at roundboy123456@yahoo.ca if you're interested in coming.

In other news: after not doing much to actively gain for the last little while, I find myself wanting to strap the feed bag back on.

While at work I stepped on that giant scale at work again - managed to tip it to 96 kg (211 lbs) but only because I was wearing heavy work boots and holding a jug of water.  Got me thinking that it's time to actually break the 210 pound threshold.  I'm close now but it seems somehow symbolic to be able to get there...without the work boots on!

8 July 2014

Yes, I know it's been a month since my last post...

I've been away for a good part of it for work related reasons I won't bore you with.  One of the upshots was that I was able to attend World Pride in Toronto and got to march in the parade.  This was a once in a lifetime opportunity and I really enjoyed it.  Well, most of it.  The 42 degree Celsius humidex...not so much.  Not to sound like a drama queen but I really felt closer to death by the end of the parade than I have in a long, long time. The whole thing took hours to do, I stupidly hadn't thought to pack enough water, and there weren't any options for getting more on the parade route. But I survived, had a blast overall, and met a number of really awesome people (none of them gainers as far as I know but more than a few bears).

I kept my calories up by eating a number of strange things (some of which I'm pretty sure now weren't gluten free though they were advertised as such) and although I have no gains to report, I didn't backslide either.

And...today I was the recipient of a large amount of high end (read: expensive) gluten free food from a neighbour whose kid works at a warehouse that carries this stuff.  They were getting rid of some stale dated inventory and I ended up with half a freezer full of some very, very nice stuff...so...yay!

And to Anonymous: I may just try this approach of dedicating one day a week to having extra and then just maintaining for the rest of the week.  I'll let you know how it goes...

4 June 2014

Was away at conference last week - ended up bringing the wrong jacket which wouldn't have been a big deal except that the one I did bring had the company logo all over it (which would have gone over like a lead fart had I gotten into any trouble during our night time escapades around town.  Also was getting some sideways looks from coworkers for wearing it at all.  As it was, I scared some girls at the bar because apparently I looked like security which, in retrospect, kind of suggests they were probably too young to be in there at all).  Anyway...

One of the guys I was at the conference with was, in my opinion, a fair bit heavier and bulkier than I consider myself to be at this point.  When the whole jacket issue came up, he offered to lend me one of his plain jackets saying he figured we had the same build...which...made my whole week.

Looking back at some of the videos from the conference that have already shown up on Facebook, it's kind of shocking to see just how much bigger I am.  Sometimes just looking in the mirror at home it's hard to grasp just how profoundly getting fatter is changing my overall appearance.

Added bonus: the food was all inclusive at the conference and it was all-you-can-eat buffet style.

Trust me, I took full advantage...and it shows...

Wow...so it's May already!  Having not really been on a gaining track over the last few weeks, I'm still hanging in around 205 lbs.

Had a funny moment the other day at work.  There's a giant platform scale on the work floor that's literally large enough to weigh an elephant on.  As I was on my way to lunch, I noticed one of my female coworkers was standing on it and I remarked that she sure didn't look like she weighed as much as the 63 kilos the scale was saying (she's about five feet tall and just shy of 140 pounds).  Which was, in retrospect, a really stupid thing to say to a woman but on the other hand, don't stand on the giant public scale with the 6 inch high readout if you don't want your coworkers to know how much you weigh!

Anyway, to make her feel better, after she stepped down, I jumped on there and it came up 93 kilos (which is actually a little light considering I was wearing steel toes and carrying a full water bottle at the time!) and you would not believe the gasps and comments I got from bystanders.  Apparently our generously sized uniforms and safety vests have been disguising the fact that I've gotten so much bigger over the last few months.  Should be interesting to see how much more people start to notice come summertime when it gets brutally hot in there and we all start to shed some layers.

Hopefully, too, by then there will be more of me to notice!

5 April 2014

This is me today at 205.  I really like the way this particular shirt fits, though I suspect in a few weeks I'm going to have a hard time getting it on at all.

3 April 2014

Well, last night I weighed myself.  I'm up to 206 pounds now.  Taking a week off last week really helped.  Kept eating the same but just hung around.  I can't help but to think of how quickly I'd gain were I unemployed...but...then I wouldn't have the money to keep buying all the extra food.

I'm finally getting used to the feeling of the extra weight in my belly - feels normal to me now.  I feel like this is a cue for me to ramp up my gaining...slowly so I don't hit the wall...but faster than the roughly 2 pounds I gained in the last month.   I mean, *any* gain is a good one, but I really do think I should be striving harder than 24 pounds in a year...

So the dinner last week was a little odd.  Nobody came, which kinda doesn't surprise me, and I'm relieved about that.  Not that I didn't want to meet anyone new...but that restaurant was NOT conducive to discrete conversation.  Just one room (and not all that big) with a whole lot of tables.

The food was okay, for being previously frozen, but very, very expensive for what I ended up getting: a two pieces of battered halibut and some fries was over $20.  I'm not sure how long this place is going to stay in business.

Anyway, I'm going to plan another "event" in a few months...maybe at an all-you-can-eat Indian buffet (I know of a couple of good places in town that are reasonably priced).

In other news, the gain is progressing...slowly...  I'm up to 204 pounds now which represents a gain of less than a pound per week.  Really not earth shattering but at least the number on the scale is moving steadily upward.

4 February 2014

So in the spirit of reaching out to community, I've decided to organize a "gainer meet and greet" next Monday February 10th.  Not sure if I have any Edmonton followers on here but I figured I'd put this out there:

Brit's Fish and Chips, 11603 - 104 Avenue (Oliver Square), 7 pm.  They DO gluten free (which is why I'm curious to try them out).  It's an added bonus that it's all deep fried high calorie food there...

Here's a link to the restaurant: http://www.britsfishandchipsab.com/

And here's a link to the Facebook event that I created for the occasion: https://www.facebook.com/events/215901501935203/?ref_dashboard_filter=upcoming

Maybe people will come...maybe they won't.  Either way, I'm going to get a nice meal out of it.

3 February 2014

So...I appear to have identified yet another roadblock to successful gaining.

I've been relying on heavy cream to get the calories necessary for building lots of body fat.  It seems like, though, when I consume too much of it, or even smaller amounts over time (for example about a half cup a day over a week or two) I get bloated and sick feeling as though I've had gluten.  I the past I chalked it up to my body simply not being able to assimilate the extra dietary fat or my digestive system's reaction to gaining in general

I did some research yesterday and discovered that it's probably NOT the fat in the cream at all...but the carrageenan used to thicken it and to prevent the fat separating from the buttermilk.  Carrageenan is produced from seaweed, which you would think would be safe for a celiac to eat...but apparently not.  There's numerous articles out there in Internet Land linking it to digestive tract inflammation and bowel disease (example: http://whattofeedyourkids.blogspot.ca/2011/08/what-is-carrageenan.html)...which makes sense because I also get the same symptoms from xanthan gum (another gluten free stabilizer/thickener that some celiacs react to).

So...what does this mean for me?  Well, no more heavy cream, unless I can find it in an unadulterated form. And, sadly, many brands of ice cream (except the super classy expensive stuff...a pint of which I currently possess and plan to eat just as soon as I get off the computer) are off limits if I want to avoid the evil seaweed.

Anyway, my adaption to this new challenge is to pick up a couple of pounds of unsalted butter...which is pure, unadulterated diary fat.  Yup.  I'm going *there* again.

I'll keep you posted as to the creative ways I can come up with to ingest this stuff without hurling...

Wish me luck!

So here's what I look like today.  I'm wearing size 36 jeans.  The belly's looking good...so far...but will be so much better when it's a LOT bigger.

1 February 2014

Well, the drastic slowdown at work (read: not working seven days a week!) combined with some good eating is paying off.  I'm currently up to a consistent 201 pounds.  It's definitely showing - I've had people commenting to me about how I appear to be getting fat (I am!).  I'm waiting for someone to actually express some kind of concern or to suggest I go on a diet.  I plan to say "Hey, I'm happy with how I am.  Why can't *you* be?"...or else "Yup...and you ain't seen nothing yet!"  Should make for either a very short or a very interesting conversation.

I'm definitely feeling the difference: everything's firmed back up again (I hate that feeling of my skin feeling too loose/large for my body after I've lost weight), belly's feeling nice and solid, and I'm feeling heavier overall especially when I run...it's distracting to realize that I'm starting to jiggle in places that I never did before.  I imagine that it's just going to get more intense as I continue gaining weight.  I'm not put out, mind you, because it's a tangible reminder that in spite of my glacially slow progress, I *am* (finally!) managing to put on some much anticipated and welcome fat to compliment the muscle I've been gaining through so much hard work over the last few months.

13 January 2014

Happy belated New Year, all!

I think I'm finally starting to recover from the Christmas season.  Back to regular work hours and definitely seeing a time when things won't be quite so confusing and hectic all around.

Back up to 197...as always, the weight seems to return pretty easily.

The push now is to spend my "extra" time eating a few more meals and getting enough sleep.

Otherwise not much new to report...